對不起﹐ 我忘了

那天﹐ 我為了一個presentation而搞到臉色很差。 我已經一個星期多沒好睡過了﹐ 最近也沒什麼胃口。 也好﹐ 這樣忙﹐ 也可以當是分散注意力﹐ 把傷心的事情放在一邊。

姐姐看見我臉色那麼差﹐ 問候了我一聲。 她笑着說﹕ “到底是你功課繁忙﹔ 還是有心事呢﹖” 這一句話﹐ 打中了我的心思﹐ 所以我把心裡的煩惱都告訴了她。

聽了過後﹐ 姐姐給了我許多的安慰和鼓勵﹐ 特別是她一句話﹐ 令我想了很久。 她問我﹕ “叢輝﹐ 你為什麼降低了你自己的要求﹔ 大減價“賣”給人家呢﹖”

姐姐說得對。 我並不需要受這些苦﹐ 流無辜的淚水。 既然她人不懂得珍惜這段感情﹐ 不顧我的感受 - 那我也不必浪費我的時間和心機在她人身上。

這句話好像蓋了我一把掌﹐ 蓋醒了我。 為什麼我那麼傻﹖ 我不會再默默地呆再這兒等待電話響﹐ SMS訊息。當我想到這裡﹐ 我頭上已經是一把火了。 不是生你的氣﹐ 是在怪我自己。 讓我道歉吧。。。 “很對不起﹐ 我忘了 - 你不是已經和我分了手嗎﹖”

現在﹐ 真是一目瞭然了。 怎樣都好﹐ 我真的希望你和他幸福快樂。 可是。。。 如果後果是相反的話。。。 你千千萬萬不要回來找我 - 我已經下了決心不吃回頭草。

Sorry, I Forgot

That day, My face complexion looked so terrible because I was all stressed about my presentation. It has already been a week since I had any proper sleep and I din't have much an appetite for a long time. It's alright, I can treat these busy times as a way of freeing my mind, putting any sad thoughts behind me.

My sister saw my horrible complexion and asked me if everything was alright. She then smiled and asked, "are you sure it's just your university workload? Or do you have other things on your mind?" This sentence hit the bulleye, so I opened the doors to my confused mind for her.

After hearing my words, my sister had alot of comforting and encouraging words to provide me with, especially one sentence, which left me pondering for quite a while. She asked me, "Chung Fui, why are you lowering your own standards so much; "selling yourself" at a "discounted price during sale?"

My sister's right. I don't need to suffer this bitter pain, waste so many innocent drops of tears. If that someone doesn't know how to cherrish this relationship that we have, not caring how I feel at all - then I shouldn't bother wasting my time and efforts on that person at all.

This piece of advice seemed to have "slapped me in the face", and woke me up. Why am I so stupid? I won't stay here silently waiting for your phone calls; neither will I wait patiently to receive your SMS messages. When I think about it now, anger really overwhelmes me. I'm not angry at you, but at myself. Let me appologise... " I'm very sorry, I forgot - Haven't you broke up with me already?"

Now, everything is as clear as the skies for me. Even so, I really do hope that the two of you will have a happy and prosperous relationship together. However... If things turn sour instead, never ever come and look for me again - I've sworn to not turn back on my words.